Every couple walks down the aisle believing they will have an awesome marriage. They’re madly in love, the other person “completes” them, and just know everything is going to be perfect.
And then life happens…
I watch so many of the families in our neighborhood where both mom and dad are working full-time jobs. They’re raising kiddos who are busy with extracurricular activities in addition to going to school and doing their homework.
Evenings are spent with one parent running a child to soccer practice while the other runs one to gymnastics. Meals are eaten on the fly as they try to stay on top of housework, laundry, and errands.
All of this while everyone in the family tries to keep up in touch with friends and family via phone calls, texts, and social media.
I don’t know about you, but I’m exhausted just typing all of that…
The thing is, it’s really not that different from our experience several decades ago. Every couple must figure out how to have an awesome marriage and love their family well when life is pulling them in different directions.
So, when my dear friend, Melanie Redd, asked me to write a post about the challenges of trying to keep relationships strong when time together is limited … I jumped on it!
Here’s our story…
How to Have an Awesome Marriage When Life Is Crazy
I vowed at a very early age that I would NEVER marry a minister. I’m not sure why – maybe it had something to do with the idea of living in a fishbowl. Anyway, you’ve gotta love God’s sense of humor because when I met this really cute pre-ministerial student my first year of college … I threw my vow out the window and there was no looking back.
I remember during our early years together having long deep conversations where we worked to solve many of our personal problems and most of the world’s problems. We just loved being together. I know, young love … right?!
But after we were married, one of our greatest challenges became trying to stay closely connected when we could no longer find time for those long conversations we loved so much.
At first, I was teaching full-time and he was going to school. Fast forward a few years and besides raising little ones … we were serving in ministry together. Rev was working a 40+ hour week for one ministry while serving at our church part-time and traveling two or three weekends a months. I was teaching part-time, and trying to keep things running smoothly at home.
We were like a couple of planes doing fly-bys.
Not only did we lack time to talk things through … I wasn’t very good returning the leadership role to Rev when he was at home.
Bottom line … good communication is hard when there’s no time to communicate!
If you’re nodding your head in agreement, thinking – that is soooo where we are right now, I’d like to share a few things we tried that helped us. (Yeah, I’m going to spare you all the things that didn’t help. You’re most likely figuring those out on your own!)
So, if you’d like to know my list of 3 things to do, 3 things to remember, and 3 things to refuse to do—head over to my friend, Melanie Redd’s to read …
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