How To Surrender Painful Memories & Live With Joy Now

Sharing is caring!

Is it hard for you to surrender your painful memories?

A photo. A smell. A melody. Almost anything can spark a memory and its corresponding emotion.

We each carry around a sack full of emotional memories, and the truth is, our memories have the power to make us smile or bring us to tears. Everyone lives with happy and painful memories.

Every remembrance imprinted on our hearts and minds becomes part of us, and like it or not, influences our beliefs, attitudes, words, and actions.

But with God’s help, we have all we need to control the amount of time we spend and the power we give our unpleasant recollections. We can choose what we spend our time and energy thinking about.

Christian Psychologist, David Seamands, said,

We cannot change our memories, but we can change their meaning and the power they have over us.

Have you ever had a day ruined because you couldn’t stop thinking about the painful past? Or had a perfectly pleasant experience, crash and burn because an unexpected, unhappy thought stole your joy?

Yep, me too!

But I’m learning to take Paul’s words to heart…

 Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise.

Philippians 4:8

And trust that with the Holy Spirit’s help, we don’t have to let our memories spoil the present or the future.

5 Ways to Surrender Painful
Memories and Live with Joy

1. Accept that Memories Come with Emotions.

Identifying your feelings. I’ve learned the importance of recognizing the emotional impact of my emotions quickly. Not to run from or ignore them, but to manage them through surrender.

I want to celebrate my good memories and quickly surrender my painful memories to the One who has promised to help me carry them.

Jesus said, “Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest.

Matthew 11:28

2. Remember that some painful memories are sourced in unforgiveness.

“Forgive and forget” is an idiom that has been used throughout history.

Jesus told us that we must forgive one another, but Scripture doesn’t tell us to forget. Some things are life-changing, making forgetting seem impossible. So, what do you and I do with those memories?

Again we prayerfully surrender them to God and ask Him to replace our pain with His peace.

You will keep in perfect peace all who trust in you, all whose thoughts are fixed on you!

Isaiah 26:3

I’ve found the following quote encouraging…

Forgiving does not erase a bitter past. A healed memory is not a deleted memory. Instead, forgiving what we cannot forget creates a new way to remember. We change the memory of our past into a hope for our future. ~Lewis Smedes

3. Refuse to Give Painful Memories Power.

We may not be able to change our unpleasant memories, but we can change the amount of power we give them. With God’s help, you and I can grow through the pain by replacing our painful thoughts with God’s truth.

Let the message about Christ, in all its richness, fill your lives. Teach and counsel each other with all the wisdom he gives. Sing psalms and hymns and spiritual songs to God with thankful hearts.

Colossians 3:16

4. Pray!

Ask the Lord to fill you with His Spirit, and give you everything you need to manage your memories and guard your attitude.

“And so I tell you, keep on asking, and you will receive what you ask for. Keep on seeking, and you will find. Keep on knocking, and the door will be opened to you.”

Luke 11:9

5. Count Your Blessings with a Journal of Happy Memories. 

Keep it where family members can write their favorite memory of the day or week and read them together as needed. Sharing happy memories is a wonderful way to turn a grumpy family night into an evening of praise.

“The more we express our gratitude to God for our blessings, the more He will bring to our mind other blessings. The more we are aware of what to be grateful for, the happier we become.” ~ Ezra Taft Benson

Let’s pray…

A Prayer for God’s Help to
Surrender Painful Memories

Father, thank you for giving us both memories and emotions. Without them, we would not remember past joys with people we love. So, I ask You to graciously help me manage my emotions well.

I understand that painful memories are a part of my life, but I believe that with Your help, I can surrender the pain to You and live with hope and joy. I want to be quick to forgive, so that I can focus on You while remembering my many blessings.

I trust Jesus’ promise to help me carry my burdens. Please fill me with Your Spirit, and remind me of the truths of Your Word. Please give me the strength I need to control my emotions, faithfully trusting that You are greater than my circumstances.

I thank and praise You, and pray in the precious name of my Savior, Jesus. Amen.

Finally – LIVE and make new memories! 

Be intentional about making many new happy memories.

Everyone has painful memories, but with the Lord’s help, we can LIVE and make plenty of positive impressions on our hearts and minds to overshadow the difficult ones. I promise … I’ve been there!

Find things to celebrate. Do things you love. Enjoy time with the people who encourage and inspire you.

And remember – memories will pop up when you least expect them. It’s okay.

Just like fear or many other difficult thoughts and feelings, we can repeat the steps above and make our painful memories short-lived and infrequent. With God’s help, we don’t have to let them control us.

Replace them with a song of praise, a prayer, or your favorite verse. My favorite is…

My health may fail, and my spirit may grow weak, but God remains the strength of my heart; He is mine forever.

Psalm 73:26

God will give us what we need to surrender painful memories—intentionally counting our blessings and living with joy.

We would love to pray for you.
You can leave your prayer requests here…

and even take a few minutes to pray over the list left by our friends.

Never Miss an Update

Leave your email address and I’ll send you a short email every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday to alert you to each new devotion. Plus you’ll receive a copy of 30 Ways to Bless Your Marriage and Keep the Spark Burning

I always enjoy hearing from you! Please take a minute to say ‘hi” and share your thoughts in the comments below.

And if this article blessed or helped you today — would you share it with someone? Maybe a friend, family member, coworker, or through the links below…

Thanks again for visiting! Don’t forget to check out the links below to find additional posts that will bless you…

Sharing is caring!