25 of the Best Ways to Love Yourself the Way God Wants
Welcome to week two of my Countdown to #1 Series!
This post is #7 among my most popular posts…
I don’t know about you, but I struggle with the idea of self-love. If you Google “love yourself” you’ll find a plethora of thoughts on the subject . . . some good, some not.
So I went to the Bible and searched for “love yourself” there, and…
10 places in the Bible it says, “Love your neighbor as you love yourself.”
But what does love yourself mean exactly based on God’s Word?
What if self-love is supposed to look child-like?
And Jesus said: “Truly I tell you, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven.” Matthew 18:3
You don’t have to tell little children to love themselves. They are comfortable in their own skin. They know when they’re hungry, tired, and when they need comfort and nurturing. But even more important for our discussion today little children are humble, sincere, trusting, and dependent.
But wait . . . that’s counterintuitive isn’t it? We probably wouldn’t think of self-love as humble, sincere, trusting, or dependent.
Stay with me for just a moment.
What if self-love is supposed to look like humility?
Warren Wiersbe defines true humility as:
- Knowing yourself.
- Accepting yourself.
- Being yourself.
He adds . . . “Humility begins with self-examination and continues with self-denial.”
Self-examination and self-denial—again not what we think of when we think self-love. But what if…
To love yourself God’s way … always begin with humility.
Because humble self-love is best able to love others.
Let’s take a closer look at Wiersbe’s definition of true humility.
- Knowing yourself means getting to know your personality, your values, your gifts and abilities, and your hopes and dreams . . . the you God created.
- Accepting yourself comes from having and keeping a vertical perspective. Fixing your eyes on Jesus. NOT COMPARING yourself to others.
- Being yourself means living obediently as the one of a kind, God designed person you are. Being yourself means allowing God to use you to fulfill His plans and purposes. It is allowing Him to use you to love others in ways only you are able.
You made all the delicate, inner parts of my body and knit me together in my mother’s womb. Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex! Your workmanship is marvelous—how well I know it. Psalm 139:13–14
I’m not very good at “loving myself” when it comes to giving myself regular “atta girl” pats on the back. I’m not great at self-pampering and I’m definitely not good at getting all warm and fuzzy when I look in the mirror.
But maybe that’s okay.
Because I know my:
- Personality – I’m a Phlegmatic/Sanguine which means I just want everyone to get along and have fun doing it.
- Values – My core values are grounded in my love for Jesus. Values that make me want to follow Jesus’ example of loving God and others.
- Gifts and Abilities – I’m a student who loves to teach. I have the gift of gab and I’m getting better at the gift of listening. And I love writing. If you’ve never read my About Deb Page you’ll learn more about me than you care to know.
- Hopes and Dreams – My greatest desire is to stay focused on eternal things – loving and obeying God and loving well the people He puts around me. (I probably would have answered something about my kids 20 years ago. So, don’t put too much holiness on this. I’m at my stage of life. You’re at yours.)
For the most part, I know the girl God created. Oh, I’m a work in progress when it comes to the accepting part, but I’m confident if I stay focused on Jesus and stop comparing myself to others I will do a better job there. And I will always try to do better while trusting that I am loved and accepted just the way I am.
As far as being myself . . . I think I’m okay there. Honestly, if I can’t be myself in my sixties when in the world will I start.
So, how does God want you to love yourself?
Here’s what I think.
25 Ways to Love Yourself the Way God Wants
- Remember you are valued and precious to God.
- Know, accept, and be yourself.
- Forgive yourself like God forgives you.
- Treat yourself with care and compassion.
- Care for your physical needs . . . diet, move and rest.
- Refuse to waste time on stinkin’ thinkin’.
- Ask for help when you need it.
- Sing, dance, and laugh more.
- Refuse to speak unkind words to yourself.
- Say ‘no’ when you need to.
- Do something you were created to do every day.
- Pursue your hopes and dreams.
- Be honest with yourself and others.
- Pray – ask God to help you know your strengths.
- Pray – ask God to show you your weaknesses.
- Pray – ask God for His guidance and help.
- Stop and give thanks for your life every day.
- Spend time with people you love.
- Accept what you can’t change.
- Forgive others.
- Be bold and try something new.
- Believe God has a plan and purpose for you.
- Live engaged in every moment.
- Be patient with yourself.
- Be still – know and love God.
What do you think? Are you ready to love yourself God’s way?
Remember, loving yourself God’s way equips you to love others His way too.
Blessings to you my loved friends!
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Deb thanks for this article. I have always loved myself. I know my strengths and weaknesses and my personality. After I come to no my Father in a heart way, I had problems with guilt for the things that I had done in the past. As I grow closer to God , I realized that I needed to forgive myself because God had pardon these sins through Jesus when he died for my sins. Like you i love to talk and wite. We have a God that loves us right where we are. We only have to love him to learn to love ourselves and others as He loves us.
Thanks so much, Deb, for featuring me here today! Such an honor, and I am humbled by it all. Hope those not headed in the right direction will be inspired to trust God to lead them in His ways and His truth.
Of course, I loved your words here today, too, as always!
Blessings to you!
Thanks for hosting!
25 pieces of solid wisdom! Thanks, Deb!
I might word it a little differently, but I certainly understand many of your points. I believe we need to accept God’s forgiveness and be content with who He created us to be while seeking to decrease so that He can increase in us. It’s a delicate balance. Unfortunately, in our culture, we have had a selfish me-focused understanding of loving ourselves instead of loving God and others.
Really, really loved this Deb! Sharing today. 🙂
I love that you’ve included humility in how we should love ourselves, Deb. This piece is so often missing in thoughts about identity and self-love. Thanks also for the linkup! Pinned and tweeted, my friend!
Thanks for hosting Deb. This is such a great reminder, because all too often we focus on loving others and often neglect loving ourselves. I love all 25 of your ways to love yourself ideas.. I think for me, the asking for help when I need it is where I need the most help. Blessings
Great post Deb,
I have become comfortable with no.10…just in the last decade since having chronic health issues…learning that I can be God’s child instead of His hero! Such freedom in sitting at His feet instead of fussing & doing for all!
Now I seek God’s wisdom before I say yes ;-D
Thank you for hosting,
That is a great list. That might be a bit of what I have been looking for in Bible based affirmations.
Great take on this! laurensparks.net
Love this lists. Being patient with myself is my greatest struggle but one I’m working on. Shared with our Living Our Priorities community. Stopping by from By His Grace Bloggers
Deb, This is such an important topic…and one I’ve had to face and am still working at overcoming. This morning, I was reading something about humility that keeps speaking to me: “It’s important not to confuse genuine humility with false humility. A person with false humility continually talks about his unworthiness to take on a task God has given him. On the other hand, true humility is demonstrated when a person recognized his inadequacy to do the job but accepts God’s plan and place and says, ‘This is bigger than my ability, but I trust that I can get it done with the Lord’s help.'” Rick Renner
You have faced a great big job with your Blessing Bloggers network, and God is working His plan through you. I thank God for your obedience!
I confess that I am delighted and delighted with this article, I was even moved, thank you for sharing 🙂
Thank you for this post! It came into my life at just the right time!
Joy, I’m so glad this blessed you! It’s a reminder I need regularly! Thanks so much for visiting and for stopping to say “hello.” God bless you!
Truly inspiring and uplifting… Thanks a lot for sharing your wisdom. God bless you and your family
Thank you, Maricel! I’m so glad it bless you! Thank you so much for visiting and taking the time to leave your kind encouragement. God be with you!
Thank you so much for this strengthening thoughts. It has enriched my spiritual life.
May God bless your good work.
Thank you so much, Sr. God bless you!