You Can’t Love God and Hate Your Neighbor

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The Bible says that when you love God, it’s wrong to hate your neighbor.

That’s not an easy word to hear.

It’s inspiring and encouraging to talk about how much God loves us. It’s easy to say the words, “I love God.” The challenge is when His Word says, “show me.”

Jesus said, “If you love me, you will keep my commandments.” (John 14:15)

And He described His commands like this…

“The most important commandment is this: ‘Listen, O Israel! The Lord our God is the one and only Lord. And you must love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul, all your mind, and all your strength.’ The second is equally important: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ No other commandment is greater than these.”

Mark 12:29–31

So, John, who was with Jesus throughout His ministry, wrote….

If someone says, “I love God,” but hates a fellow believer, that person is a liar; for if we don’t love people we can see, how can we love God, whom we cannot see? And He has given us this command: Those who love God must also love their fellow believers.

1 John 4:20–21

I think many would agree that it’s harder to show love to sinners with whom we interact than it is to say, “I love You” to God in heaven, who is holy and loves perfectly.

The Life Application Bible Notes add…

It is easy to say we love God when that love doesn’t cost us anything more than weekly attendance at religious services. But the real test for our love for God is how we treat the people right in front of us—our family members and fellow believers.

That’s making it personal!

The thing is, God doesn’t push our buttons or aggravate our last nerve. He doesn’t whine or complain impatiently. He doesn’t demand compliance; He invites relationships. He doesn’t berate or betray us; He answers our prayers. He provides. He forgives.

So, we ask … How do I love God and my neighbor as God commands?

7 Godly Ways to Love Your Neighbor

1. Share what you have with those less fortunate.
2. Speak the truth.
3. Live with impartial justice.
4. Refuse to participate in gossip.
5. Forgive and let go of bitterness and revenge.
6. Treat everyone with kindness and compassion.
7. Speak the truth about Jesus.

It’s a list that is true for both non-believers and believers.

But John was talking specifically about our relationships with other believers. He said that we can’t love God and hate fellow believers.

God Questions says this about hatred, no matter who it is…

Hatred is a poison that destroys us from within, producing bitterness that eats away at our hearts and minds.

Hatred hurts the hater! It ruins our attitude, character, testimony, and our witness about Jesus.

So, whether we’re interacting with believers or non-believers, we are called to speak the truth in love with gentleness and respect. If we fail, we apologize and repent quickly. And if our neighbor fails, we forgive quickly.

That’s how we love God. And it’s how to show God’s love and obey God’s command to not “hate your neighbor.”

Let’s pause and ask the Lord to help us love as He commands.

A Prayer for God’s Help to Love Him
and to Never Hate Your Neighbor

Father God, I love you! Oh, how I want to love You perfectly. Your Word tells me how to love You and my neighbor, and the more I learn, the more I realize how far I fall short of loving as You command.

I’m so very sorry. Please forgive me and help me trust and obey that Your way is better than my selfish wants and attitudes. You have been and continue to be so very good to me. I want everyone to see Your love in me. Please help.

Help me generously share Your gracious blessings. Help me speak Your truth with gentleness and respect. Help me treat everyone of every background fairly with care and kindness. Please give me the strength to walk away from gossip. And help me forgive quickly and completely.

And by the power of Your Spirit, please help me share Jesus’ love and proclaim His truth. Teach me and guide me. Fill me with Your grace, mercy, and love until it overflows to everyone around me.

I love You, Lord. Help me love as You desire. In Jesus’ name, I pray. Amen.

Quotes to encourage love…

“I am giving you a new commandment: Love each other. Just as I have loved you, you should love each other. Your love for one another will prove to the world that you are my disciples.”

John 13:34–35

“Hating people is like burning down your own house to get rid of a rat.” ~ Harry Emerson Fosdick

“Do not seek revenge or bear a grudge against a fellow Israelite, but love your neighbor as yourself. I am the Lord.”

Leviticus 19:18

“Too many Christians become bitter and angry in the conflict. If we descend into hatefulness, we have already lost the battle. We must cooperate with God in turning what was meant for evil into a greater good within us. This is why we bless those who would curse us: It is not only for their sakes but to preserve our own soul from its natural response toward hatred.” ~ St. Francis

 “But to you who are willing to listen, I say, love your enemies! Do good to those who hate you. Bless those who curse you. Pray for those who hurt you.”

Luke 6:27–28

May the Spirit bless you and me with everything we need to love God, our neighbors, and every member of His family as the Lord commands.

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